What the actual fuck is happiness?
As a person that almost got into depression a few months ago, I though that I've discovered happiness so far. But I was wrong. I got myself into trouble and I can't get out without hurting people. The last days we're probably the most beautiful days of that person's life, but for me sucked. I want to be lonely again. Because it's better. You do not have to hurt people again, because nobody gets close to you. And trust me, I'm so sick of letting people in. All my secrets and dreams and hopes should stay with me here in my room.
Before, I died a hundred times here, in this room, waiting for something better, but I finally decided that I don't want something better. Maybe because I don't deserve it. I have demons inside me. Now leave me
alone with them. Please. I will be grateful, I promise.
Thursday, 24 July 2014
Thursday, 10 July 2014
Deception Point
My pasion for Dan Brown's books started when I was in the
8th grade and I read "Angels and Demons". I was impressed of his way
of writing, so he became one of my favourite authors.
"Deception Point" is one of that books that worth
reading, not only for its amazing story, but also for some life lessons that it
offers.
The story beggins when a NASA satellite discovers an
astonishingly rare object burried deep in the Arctic ice. The floundering space
agency proclaims a much-needed victory - a victory with prodound implications
for NASA policy and the impending presidential election.To verify its
authenticity, the White House calls upon Rachel Sexton's skills of intelligence
analyst. She travels to Arctic accompanied by a team of experts, including the
charismatic scholar Michael Tolland (spoiler alert: here it comes a love
story).
There, they uncover the unthinkable: evidence of scientific
trickery - a bold deception that threatens to plunge the world into
controversy. But before she can warn the President, Rachel and Michael are
ambushed by a deadly team of assassins. Fleeing for their lives across a
desolate and lethal landscape, their only hope for survival is to discover who
is behind this masterful plot. The truth, they will learn, is the most shocking
deception of all.
The thing about Dan Brown's books is that you think you can
anticipate the end but, in fact, you cannot. Keep in mind: nothing is what it
seems.
Tuesday, 3 June 2014
Phenomenal Woman?
One day, our English teacher requested us to create a poem, called "Phenomenal Woman", written from a man's perspective. Let's see if I succeeded.
Thursday, 8 May 2014
It's time
We broke up. That still hurts me. But I had to do that, our relationship couldn't go on like that. We hadn't been talking for a while, you only said "hello" to me at school and when I paid a visit to you when you were sick, you ignored me. And I couldn't explain myself why. I felt ignored. I've been waiting for you to give me a sign, to show me that I do mean something for you, but nothing happened.
So, I had to do this. I'm sorry if I broke your heart. But I also broke mine. You know, last night I couldn't fall asleep because you were in my mind. Fuck "Je ne regrette rien", I want you back. I regret we broke up, but that had to happen. I was not feeling loved anymore. But this doesn't mean I don't want you back. Please forgive me.
Now it's time to get over you. It will be difficult, I'm pretty sure about it. But hey, this is the life, isn't it?
So, I had to do this. I'm sorry if I broke your heart. But I also broke mine. You know, last night I couldn't fall asleep because you were in my mind. Fuck "Je ne regrette rien", I want you back. I regret we broke up, but that had to happen. I was not feeling loved anymore. But this doesn't mean I don't want you back. Please forgive me.
Now it's time to get over you. It will be difficult, I'm pretty sure about it. But hey, this is the life, isn't it?
Friday, 4 April 2014
Flowers for Algernon
What can I say... I have't read such a good book before.
First of all, who is Algernon? Well, Algernon is a little white mouse, like those that are used for experiments. It's intelligence was raised, of course, because of an experiment. But it isn't the main character. That's Charlie.
Charlie is a retarded man in his mid-thirteens. He barely knew how to read and write, and his life experience was null. He was cleaning toilets and carrying goods at a bakery. He had always wanted a thing in his life: intelligence. A miracle happens and one day, after a difficult surgery (like the one that was made on Algernon), his life was getting better... or not. Charlie's IQ became higher and higher, but despite this, he was a terrible person. He became selfish and arrogant. He considered him superior and when it came about love... he was worse than a teenager.
To be honest, I didn't like the book first. Maybe it was it's cover (because yes, I often use this criterion of judging), maybe the idea of it, or even the first pages. But I wanted to finish it and magic happened and I'm in love with this book and yes, I've amost cried when I finished it last night. I think that everyone who consideres him a "good reader" should read it, because it really worths. This Sci-Fi story will make you see the world, the people ... different. You can feel pity and anger in the same time. Just, give it a try.
Monday, 24 March 2014
The Girl in Black with Purple Necklace
"Thank you", I've
heard as I walked into my room.
I was confused. Who said that? I didin't recognise
the voice. And it was impossible for somebody to reach my room, as long as the
front room was locked.
"Thank you very much", the voice said.
Again. Where did the sound come from? "My life is amazing because of
you" it said again, just to realise that the sound was coming from the big
canvas from the wall. But it was not the same as I remembered.
There was a girl with big blue eyes that was smiling
at me. She blinked. How did it happen? Was it even possible?
"What's going on here?" I asked.
"Well, today is a big day" she answered me.
"I finally decide to talk to you. You know? It's been two years
and..."
"Wait! Can you talk?! And how?!"
"I can, but I don't know how I do it. It just...
happens."
"Umm... okay", I said.
"And I really wanted to thank you for creating
me. When I first opened my eyes, two years ago, it was a beautiful night. I saw
you sleeping. The lamp was turned on. Perhaps you fell asleep while
reading."
1 second
2 seconds
3 seconds
"Oh no. You're still here" I said, after
opening my eyes.
The girl in the picture was still smiling. Her
purple necklace created a beautiful contrast with her black shirt. She was
beautiful. When I painted her, I knew she was the girl I want to become one
day. I breathed in. Then I breathed out and decided to leave the things like
they were. Yes, I had a talking canvas in my room. And maybe that was a proof that
miracles do exist.
"So, what's up?" I've asked her, feeling
weird and amazed in the same time.
The moonlight came through my window, and it was
announcing a beautiful and interesting night.
Friday, 14 March 2014
Wandering
I am getting so bored. I'm wandering through this life and I have no goals to reach. What am doing? Till now, I wasn't like this. I was an optimistic girl, who wanted to be someone in life, to achieve something, but now I can't even recognise myself. What happened to me? Why do I have no purpose? I need to do something, or my life will start to ruin.
Oh, wait! It already did.
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